Loraxian Wiki


John Pork (September 12th 1992 - March 3rd 2023), or John Porks, was a social media influencer and ex gangster, made famous for his human pig hybrid appearance. He is best known for a video of him calling Steven Steaks. There is some controversial speculation that he may have been a Furry.

Early Life[]

Pork was born in Ontario, Canada in 1992. Contrary to popular belief, John was not born with his iconic pig like appearance that we know him for today, he was just very, very handsome and sexy. Growing up he experienced severely be hit on, making him self conscious of the way he looked. The hitting on got so severe that Pork and his family moved to Atlanta Georgia in 2002 after the Pork family's residence was vandalized by Pork's Stan’s.

Life in Atlanta[]

While in Atlanta, John's mother decided that it would be best for John to be home schooled to avoid the bullying and harassment that the family faced in Ontario.

Plastic Surgery Gone Wrong[]

In 2009 at the age of 17, John Pork invested all of his savings into plastic surgery in a chance to fix is ugly looks. However, it backfired. Without John's knowledge, the doctors performing the surgery worked for the CIA and were conducting illegal experiments through plastic surgery on citizens of the United States. Pig DNA was injected through John's skin while under anesthetics and he was dumped in a back alley 5 days after the experiment was deemed successful. The same day his body was dumped, he was discovered by members of the Crips and was forcefully jumped in.

Gang Activities & Creation of the Funniest Video Ever[]

He was notorious around Atlanta as an extreme gangster who would kill anyone who even just slightly aggravated him. He continued this behavior until he ''Saw the way of god" and decided to become a social media influencer.

John Pork's life and criminal career were deeply intertwined with his arch-rival, Nathaniel Beef, a high-ranking member of the Bloods. Their fierce rivalry, fueled by personal vendettas and territorial disputes, defined much of John's activities within the Crips. The tension between them culminated in a violent confrontation on February 2nd, 2023, where John ultimately ended Nathaniel's reign, marking a pivotal moment in the gang's history and his own legacy.

Once he made the discovery of Jesus Christ, he called his friend, Steven Steaks. Steven, being the dickhead he is, did not pick up and screen recorded the call, leading to the birth of the funniest video known in human history.


News report about John Porks death

News about his death.

Unfortunately, John Pork was shot 72 times in the chest by gangsters known as Sabiel and Eduwin, killing him instantly. It is said that these two indivisuals assasinated him was because of his rising popularity, and his former affiliation with the Crips. However, there has been new information about what caused his death-Sabiel and Eduwin have said that they served a demon. Sabiel and Eduwin were both found extremely-uber-guilty and sentenced to 52 life sentences plus 80 years in prison for crimes against humanity.